Day #7: This is usually the day the people who aren't serious about saying No drop off.
Day #7: This is usually the day the people who aren't serious about saying No drop off.
I've done this for years. I know the patterns.
We’ve hit a full Week of NO. How are you tracking?
Every year I do this, there are those who skim the first 7 days and then bail, thinking they have everything they need to consistently build a habit of protecting their time, attention and energy by mastering the art of NO.
If you’re one of those people— Adios! I hope you got what you needed. If you’re not one of those people, the next 23 days are going to be some of the most instructive, interesting and, hopefully, transformative of your year.
Why wait until December 31st to think of your New Year’s Resolutions?
Today we’re going to help plan out your 2024. Every year since 2003, I’ve sat down in November to plan out the following year. It used to coincide with my being on a plane on the home from an annual conference, so I’d always scribble the broad brushstrokes onto a napkin on the tray table. You can make your own planning ritual, but I really do encourage you to do it in November and get a running start in December, rather than waiting until January 1st to put your plan into action. By January you’ll already be at a running speed on your goals.
Read more about the research on why you’re better placed to make big decisions ‘before’ the big date ticks over. (ie. Make big life changes at 29, 39, 49, or make your NY Resolutions in November, or plan your following week on a Thursday.)
Don’t forget: Your time belongs to you.
Think of it like money you have in a bank, and there’s no refunds on anything you buy. Ever. If you don’t want to continue spending that money (time) on something that is just bleeding your account dry with nothing to show for it, give it the big old…
There are things that you have been doing that once served you well. That does not mean they are serving you well now.
A lot of the process of planning out your year involves honestly assessing the things in your life that are holding you back, simplifying your days, and ruthlessly excising the things that no longer serve you.
Homework:
I would highly encourage you to read ‘s brilliant, brain-changing book “Four Thousand Weeks” to help you on your journey here. It’s the perfect time of year to read it.
When you finish that, pick up “Build The Life You Want” by @Arthur C. Brooks and his new friend Oprah. (his book “From Strength To Strength” is also excellent.)
Again, telling your boss NO is quite simple, but not easy.
Enduring your peer pressure is quite simple, but not easy.
Protecting your irreplaceable time is quite simple, but not easy.
Staying on your course when everyone tells you to change it is simple, but not easy.
Baby steps. NO takes practice. Start small, and work your way up.
Tomorrow, we’re going to delve into why you have a compulsion to apologize after saying No, and why it isn’t helping anyone. (Sorry not Sorry.)
Good luck,
- Jason
Further reading:
–Oliver Burkeman, Four Thousand Weeks
–Greg McKeown, Essentialism
–David Allen, Getting Things Done
–James Clear, The Ivy Lee Method
–Nir Eyal, Indistractible
–Marie Forleo, Ultimate Guide to Saying No